So today I went to the chiropractor. My back has been bothering me; enough that I am losing sleep so I decided to check it out. On top of that I've had a cold and am feeling kind of yucky and tired. I ended up getting scheduled with a woman dr. which is what I had kind of hoped for - more comfortable for some reason. So she walks in and she comes across right away as really friendly once I get past the cute round little belly sticking out from the center of her. Yup - my chiropractor looks to be about 5 or 6 months pregnant which is what I would have been had our first transfer been successful. So sweet right? ya - it is. My first emotion is unbelief at the irony and the urge to cry. But then I tell myself not to be ridiculous and that it has nothing to do with me. Anyway - it was all good. I mentioned that I had back problems when I was pregnant and that my kid is 25 lbs and I lug him around. So this bonded us and she talked about pregnancy and prenatal classes. So, what I did was put the face of "sad lady who wants to be pregnant and isn't" on the back burner and brought out my other personality - the mom of a cute little boy who can bond with other mothers in the joy of motherhood. They are both real and I guess it's all about focus. All in all it went well. I really liked her and I feel better so it was successful! The cliche for the day is "What doesn't kill us makes us stronger". I dealt with it and that's that.
Stay in your lane. Don't look at other people's papers. Those couple of lines jumped out at me as I read Maria Goff's book " Love Lives Here" It reminded me that we can't all live the same life. Comparisons hold us back and discourage us like nothing else. We have fears of being different when we are SUPPOSED to be different. I grew up trying to fit in and not doing a very good job at it. When I was in my teens I thought I'd try a new approach so I started trying to be the opposite of what I was because I thought that is what everyone else wanted me to be. I am chatty and energetic and I tried to be dainty and quiet. I didn't do a very good job of that either. Yikes. Trying to be someone we're not is exhausting and it doesn't work. We seldom fool anyone or achieve the goal we thought we wanted. What we all really want I think, is to connect with one another and to matter. As an adult I have had goals and held them up against other p...
Comments
I am glad to hear that you are enjoying time with company and friends/family, and that the weather is nice. You always do better when you can have a little sunshine....enjoy it while it lasts.
It is also nice that you can enjoy the little blessing you already have in Caden until you are blessed enough to extend the family a little further.
Glad to hear you are having some special alone time, taking part in yoga classes etc....good for you!
Hope the back feels better, and I am still thinking of you two lots!
Keep on keepin' it real on the blog. I truly enjoy reading your thoughts, and getting a better understanding of where your at!
Love ya!
Jacquie